


It's Always the Quiet Ones

by kennedie_exe



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Markus isn't slick, North is done with both of them, Thirsty Connor (Detroit: Become Human), braincells are lost, he is Thirsty, text fic, thAT'S A TAG???, this is the biggest shitpost i've ever done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-10 06:20:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17420684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kennedie_exe/pseuds/kennedie_exe
Summary: In which Connor is thirsty, Markus isn't slick and North wants both of them to STOP





	It's Always the Quiet Ones

**Author's Note:**

> @headraline curse you and the rest of discord for this  
> (I love yall <3)

<ConCon: North! Nooooorth!

 

<West: Connor what happened??? are you okay???

 

<ConCon: North listen to me right now!

 

<West: we're texting????

 

<ConCon: fuckin…. have you ever had a dick so good it cured your depression?

 

<West: i'm a lesbian, idiot

 

<ConCon: but… you know what I mean

 

<West: no???

 

<ConCon: well I’m a changed man now North

 

<ConCon: C H A N G E D

 

<West: okay and who was the lucky man to fuck your twink ass

 

<ConCon: first of all i’m not a twink

 

<West: yes tf you are, but go off

 

<ConCon: that guy liked my ass enough soooo

 

<West: stfu and tell me who gave you the best damn dick of Detroit

 

<ConCon: you… would not… believe it

 

<West:... And?

 

<ConCon: can I just tell you how good it was??? Like I literally couldn't walk straight this morning

 

<West: you're not straight so do you really ever walk straight

 

<ConCon: I hate you

 

<West: love you too

 

<ConCon: okay but his dick

 

<West: N O I DON'T NEED TO HEAR THE DETAILS

 

<ConCon: but it was soooooo big like it actually fit inside of me

 

<ConCon: just

 

<ConCon: _wow_

 

<West: CONNOR PLS

 

<ConCon: I've never been so stretched in my life North like listen, I TOOK IT ALL

 

<West: Why are yOU TELLING ME T H I S???

 

<ConCon: who else am I supposed to scream at about getting dicked down

 

<West: Not me?????

 

<ConCon: but you're my best friend! Isn't that what best friends are supposed to do????

 

<West: asdfghjkl you haven't even given me a name yet

 

<ConCon: ...how pissed would you be if I didn't get a name…

 

<West: CONNOR

 

<ConCon: fucked the memory right of me

 

<West: C O N N O R

 

<ConCon: okay he had a meeting today so he had to leave. Even made me breakfast in bed and I'll never forget those gorgeous eyes of his

 

<West: that's the first sweet thing you've said about him

 

<ConCon: his dick was sweet too, took is all the way down my throat and didn't rupture anything

 

<West: I shouldn't have expected nothing more

 

<ConCon: but also he had the most adorable freckles from his face to his chest, that little bit of stubble that drove me crazy

 

<West: I'm gonna stop you right there… describe his eyes

 

<ConCon: hmmm one blue, one green, right and left eye respectively

 

<West: and his hair…?

 

<ConCon: nothing more than a buzz cut which was sad because I like pulling hair

 

<West: ……

 

<ConCon:?????

 

<ConCon: did you have a stroke or

 

<ConCon: North hello???

 

<West: I'm thinking…

 

<ConCon: since when do you think things over?

 

<West: this is important… you said he had a meeting today right?

 

<ConCon: well if you scroll up, you wouldn't have to ask that question

 

<West: bitch I'll stab you

 

<ConCon: do it, no balls

 

<West: fuckin…

 

<ConCon: but another thing, he seemed really shy until I put on the ol Connor charm

 

<West: you're as charming as an eel

 

<ConCon: noooo I'm not the Grinch

 

<West: but you said he's… shy?

 

<ConCon: he was, but a few of my words made something click inside of him

 

<ConCon: because the way he held me down, he was soooo rough

 

<West: S T O P

 

<ConCon: _it's always the quiet ones_

 

<West: WAIT A FUCKIN MINUTE

 

<ConCon: ????

 

<ConCon: North… hello???

 

<ConCon: did you have a stroke again

 

<West: Markus Manfred

 

<ConCon: Ohhhh that's it! That's his name… should have remembered it myself from screaming it so much, you know him?

 

<West: no no no… this is unreal

 

<West: there's no way…

 

<ConCon: are you calling me a liar??? I can show the bruises on my ass right now

 

<West: what, did he smack an ass onto you?

 

<ConCon: that's a low blow

 

<West: and you love me anyways

 

<West: but anyways, MARKUS FUCKING. MANFRED??? Markus ‘don't be so crass around me’ Manfred???

 

<ConCon: he was more than crass last night, downright filthy and a nice ass on him too

 

<West: I can't believe this… he's such a prude

 

<West: HE CLOSES HIS EYES WHEN HE SEE TIDDIES

 

<ConCon: he couldn't get enough of mine last night

 

<ConCon: sucked the souls out of them

 

<West: you're CANCELED

 

<ConCon: I've never been aired ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

<West: I'm gonna talk to you later… I need to get this all straightened out

 

<West: and don't you dare make a gay joke

 

<ConCon: so it's okay for you to do it but not me???

 

<West: yes duh, now bye Con

 

<ConCon: byyyeeee North

 

\---

 

<North: YOU UNDERCOVER HOE

 

<Markus: I'm sorry what?

 

<North: this whole time I thought you were a prude

 

<North: BUT YOU'RE OUT HERE FUCKIN TWINKS???

 

<Markus: What are you talking about?

 

<North: don't play dumb with me now, I know your dirty ways, Marky

 

<Markus: Please, not with that nickname

 

<North: it's either that or Karcus, pick your poison

 

<Markus:… Can you please tell me why I'm being attacked right now?

 

<North: where were you at last night?

 

<Markus: Staying at a friend's house…

 

<North: oh, so a _friend?_ And what did you and this friend do?

 

<Markus: Just… hung out.

 

<North: no, no you're not gonna lie to me

 

<North: I KNOW YOU FUCKED CONNOR ANDERSON

 

<North: oh, don't get silent on me now

 

<North: Markus istg

 

<Markus: I was taking a call

 

<North: so are you going to tell me about your _friend???_

 

<Markus:... It's nothing

 

<North: _nothing???_ he basically told me you fucked the soul out of him

 

<North: and _back into him_

 

<North: or how he said he couldn't walk this morning jfc

 

<Markus: I can't believe he told you…

 

<North: uh hello??? he's like my best friend

 

<Markus: And I was unaware of that…

 

<North: so are you going to tell me how you, Mr. ‘I don't kiss on the first date’ is fucking Connor on the regular

 

<Markus: it's… not on the regular

 

<North: oh??? so you admit you fucked him???

 

<Markus: it's complicated…

 

<North: MARKUS I SWEAR YOU BETTER NOT BREAK HIS HEART OR IMMA FIGHT YOU

 

<North: besides him gushing about your dick, he seems to like you

 

<North: don't fuck it up because I know how you are

 

<Markus: I won't

 

<North: damn, it really is always the quiet ones.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I really have nothing to say about this fic like at all and hey, maybe there will be more. Who knows ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> One comment is one brain cell gained back


End file.
